Gingers have a tough time, but it’s not all that bad.

Ranga, Ginger-pubes, Ginger-minger, Carrot, Rhiangutan (a personal fave), tampon-head…the list of insults that I have been subjected to over the years is never-ending.

Life’s always been a struggle for the ginger people and there’s even the odd case of serious abuse today. Still, things have got a little better since the 15th century when I would have been burnt at the stake for being a witch or hunted down for my pale skin, which was believed to be a trait of the vampire.

Sometimes it feels as though the witch hunt is far from over, but instead of trying to disguise my fiery head in a shade of blonde or brunette, I deal with my Ginger ‘disease’ by embracing it. You can beat the bullies if you stay ginger and proud.

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Gingers are still tormented, but it’s not as bad as it used to be. Here’s why:

I don’t have to bleach my upper lip

I may not have glossy, perfect tumbling brunette locks but at least I don’t have a ‘tache.

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Nice ‘tache

We’re a rare breed

The gingers are dying out. It’s true. Only 4% of the world’s population are redheaded and I am proud to be part of this exclusive group. In the near future my people will probably become extinct, so if you think about it I am as legendary as the DoDo or a dinosaur.

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Keep kicking us and we’ll die out

My friends can always spot me from afar 

My glowing white skin and my bright hair make me impossible to miss- I am instantly recognisable. There’s no awkwardness with the person waving at you in the distance, it is definitely me.

spot the ginger

Spot the ginger girl (Pic: Ben Stanfield)

The health benefits

Amongst other insults thrown my way, I’ve also acquired the name ‘Shade-Gremlin’ because I tend to avoid the sun. I don’t tan, because I can’t. I have to wear factor 50+ even in England, but I don’t care because I have a smaller chance of getting skin cancer. Every cloud…

What I had to take away with me last summer

What I had to take away with me last summer

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It’s a hard life

Gingers Unite

Ginger people do actually unite together. If I walk past a fellow ginger, I either think to myself “that person is also ginger”, or I give them a nod in ginger solidarity. We acknowledge one another with silent approval and understanding.

Redhead Day in the Netherlands

Redhead Day in the Netherlands (pic: Eddy Van 3000)

We’re harder to knock out

It has been scientifically proven that gingers need more anaesthetic than blondes or brunettes. In an article on the BBC, Doctor Edwin Liem said: “Since red hair can be traced to particular mutations in the melanocortin 1 receptor, we now have the opportunity to evaluate central nervous system pathways that may influence or mediate anaesthetic requirement.”

Aside from suggesting all ginger people are mutants, this means we are super strong. So don’t mess, yeah?

Gingers need 20% more anaesthetic, apparently.

Gingers need 20% more anaesthetic, apparently. Put ‘em up

The guys on Tinder bloody love it

There’s always going to be someone out there who ‘has a thing for redheads’. Whether this attention is wanted or not is another matter, but it’s still flattering nonetheless. Unless your name is Casper…

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Hmm…soz Casper

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Bit rude but I’ll take it

Playing dress up is easy

Don’t have a fancy dress costume? No biggie. Just grab a stripy tie, make a cape out of a bin liner and you’re a Weasley. If you’re feeling really creative you can fashion a wand out of a stick. (See below).

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Fake tan is NOT your friend

You might be tempted to turn to fake tan after years of torment over your pasty complexion, but the sooner you accept your ghostly white appearance the easier your life will become. Unless you want this to happen:

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It actually looks painful

We rarely get spots

If nothing else convinces you, gingers usually have a flawless complexion with not a zit in sight.

Might look like a ghost but it's better than the zit on your face

Might look like a ghost but it’s better than your zits

Ginger role models

Florence Welch, Ginger Spice, the Weasleys, Ann Robinson, Lindsay Lohan (think of the Parent Trap and the Mean Girls days), Lily Cole, Axl Rose, David Bowie, Prince Harry. The list goes on. Like them or not, they’re all more influential and more powerful than you.

I mean, would you wanna mess with the Celtic warrior Queen Boudicca? I think not.

Boudicca - you go girl!

Boudicca – you go girl!

My overall message to my fellow gingers is to hang on in there and embrace your ginger genes. To all the non-gingers out there, stop asking me what colour my pubic hair is.

  • Devil’s Advocate

    …but your pubic hair’s ginger, right?

    • Rhian Lubin

      no, it’s purple

      • Matt Taylor

        I can confirm that Rhian Lubin has ginger pubes

        • Rhian Lubin

          hahahahaa

  • Margot

    I love your article :) (from a proud ginger girl!)

  • Anonymous

    My role model is Cintia Dicker, she’s amazing! :)

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  • Emma

    This just made my day, well done girl!

  • Barry

    The revolution could be televised, it will certainly be pale skinned, freckled and coming to a city near you soon. http://www.gingerwithattitude.com :)

  • Purpleshade

    I’m not quite sure what all the recent fuss is about. I’ve been ginger for 63 years and I’ve not been teased over it, neither has my daughter as far as I know. Mostly I find people (especially men) are very admiring of my ginger locks so much so that I colour it even brighter now that I have some white showing, (yes gingers tend to go white not grey). I do have to be careful of the sun…very careful as I live in one of the sunniest inhabited places in the world that is, Western Australia. OTHER ADVANTAGES… Very little and very fair arm and leg hair, clear skin that needs little attention and is not prone to acne, people remember me

  • Micky Stirrups

    as a fellow ginger kudos for the article. I wouldn’t mind the (frequent) jokes I get if any of them were any good. I have only heard one good ginger joke and it was one my dad told me (a fellow ginger). He said tell that joke to people and they’ll see that calling you carrot top ain’t having no effect whatsoever on you. It is really offensive tho so I won’t put it on here! To any adolescent male reading this article – don’t give up hope. Whilst some women like tall men, or well built men, or rich men, I have found that there is a population of women in the country that love a bit of ginger. Stay strong, brothers!

  • Emma

    I think it means we’re more likely to get skin cancer

    • Katie

      If you avoid the sun and stay in the shade, no it doesn’t!

      • Tom Jones

        Then it’s just rickets and osteomalacia to contend with instead…

  • Lee

    We aren’t going extinct. The percentage of gingers hasn’t changed significantly since ancient Rome..

  • Anonymous

    You are hot. I would.

  • Anonymous

    This article is fab, makes me laugh everytime, so so true!!

  • Ol

    I am ginger and I hate myself for it. Several times I’ve tried to end it all. I just don’t want to live like this. Tonight I’m going to finish it I just can’t face another day

  • lol

    Fuck Box, its a bag of dead cats.

  • Y Draig Goch

    Hahahaha brilliant article, bloody Welsh eh butt

  • Tedrick

    Buzzin

  • Tedrick

    Dim un gair Cymraeg.. Siomedig

  • Jennifer

    Yeah, it’s “now in a minute”, not “in a minute now”.

    I wasn’t sure where it was going initially given the poor grammar at the top. (“an” not “and” English student) (“travelling” not “traveling)” and the irony of “All English students will assume your thick” (you’re not your!!!)doesn’t help your cause. As amusing as it is, please improve your writing so all English students don’t think we are all thick!!!

    • Lee

      Glad you picked up on these errors; saved me the hassle of pointing them out!

  • WelshieInTheNorth

    The bars in Bridgend resemble the Mos Eisley Cantina in Star Wars. Don’t.

  • Anna

    Author says not to assume we’re all from the valleys, yet doesn’t mention anywhere further north than Neath, and no mention of anything in the language they’re supposedly writing about. Well done, you’re clearly quite the expert on Wales.

  • Sarah Penney

    I’m from Neath and nobody seems to understand why I pronounce ‘ear,’ ‘year’ and ‘here’ the same.

  • Welsh not British

    For the record if you google “man arrested for sheep sex” all you will get is results of English people (mostly Cockneys) molesting farm animals.

  • Trish

    Just to set the record straight, we do not do our washing up in the bath on Sandy Lane. Most of us just leave it outside with washing -up liquid on it and wait for it to rain, Oh, and there are no lion-headed men living here either! I think Kay Smythe needs to get her facts straight before writing such drivel.

  • mary p a

    I think I found this funny .see I cant make up my mind don’t know if I’m coming or going.

  • Nia

    Who’s coat is this jacket?

    • That Guy

      Who’s shoes are these trainers?

  • Jonathan Harris

    Wait, I’m from Bridgend… *Looks up from his cider filled garden, in England, Somerset.* Would still shit on the English side of the bridge.

  • Amy

    What a pile of crap. I’ve lived in wales my whole life & I can tell you that probably 3 or 4 things you said are right. Clearly you haven’t done your research butt.

  • james

    weekend nights in Bridgend are alright, Bridgend was good before the depression

  • Greebo

    I find this extremely racist and offensive. I would be most grateful if you would publish your address so that we can make a similar assessment of your region and possibly introduce you to the Cardiff Kiss!

  • valleyboy

    Shit myself ave ew, is my favourite

  • Bethan Siân Goodwin

    I’ve never used the words blotto or mitching… i use hammered/pissed or mutching

  • Spanky

    So written by a Swansea Jack then??

  • Jon

    Definitely wrriten by a Jack or it would’ve said never go to Swansea, it’s full of caravans and peg selling gypos

  • shazpot

    Where I live, they say Mast not butt. Properly pronounced Mwaast or Mwwaaaaaast! So “how are you my friend?” would be “er rite Mwaast?” Women are strictly forbidden to use it due to it needing a convincing pirate accent.

  • Nick.

    The writing in this “article” is fucking atrocious. That mixed with the fact that this clown is obviously a football fan from Swansea, and the fact that they reckon the Gower is the bicest place in Wales, makes this barely readable. How is this crap allowed to be published?

  • Blod

    Tedious. A badly written article. All been said before. Yawn…

  • James Linnane

    We also put “mun” on the end of a load of sentences

  • oomagoolies

    Where’s my daps..???

  • Andres Rodriguez Guapacha

    I do have a thing for ginger girls. Shame they don’t seem interested in Latin guys T_T

  • Mr. Tinder

    Don’t where this dislike for redheads comes from, they’re freakin hot

  • No Soul, No Worries

    Ginger and proud :D

  • Joel

    Gingers actually have more of a risk of getting cancer.

  • Not Projecting

    Unfortunate that I’m a ginger guy with shit skin, then

  • KB

    Axl Rose being a role model however…

  • Brock

    I never knew being ginger gave you ginger teeth as well – until I saw the first photo.

  • Will Godwin

    Sun cream blocks vitamin D production in your skin which is know to help prevent cancer, therefore using factor 50 sun cream makes you more likely to get cancer
    http://scholar.google.co.uk/scholar?q=sunscreen+vitamin+d+journal&hl=en&as_sdt=0&as_vis=1&oi=scholart&sa=X&ei=Tz2QU4qCLaev7AbsjoDwAw&ved=0CCQQgQMwAA

  • Lord Hardtrasher

    So… does the carpet match the curtains?

  • Nick Johnson

    Yeah. I’d fuck her.

  • ging

    we’re not dying out, that’s a myth, check your facts ffs

  • Dave

    A lot of people will be disappointed by this.

    I was hoping for something genuinely amazing to top Red Leicester. Probably best to wait until the first night to properly decide but I’m not yet convinced.

  • mary p a

    Reading this I have just realised I am saying that all the time.